Friday, March 15, 2013


Posting has felt more chore-like than documentary lately.

So much on my mind, but none of it suited to be shared. As open as I am, there are thoughts and feelings, that are usually fleeting, that don't or shouldn't be documented. It's weird for me to be semi filtered.

I'm also under a lot of deadlines. I react one of two ways with an oncoming deadline. I either speed my little hiney up and get 'er done or I do everything possible except the things that would be helpful in meeting my deadline and then scramble around like a crazy girl trying to stuff too many things in too few of hours.

The thing is, everything I'm doing I want to do. I asked to do. So, then I get to this blog at the end of the night and feel completely ungrateful for even thinking about mentioning that I feel stressed and overwhelmed and completely out of my league. And I'm just talking about the mountain of laundry I have to fold, not to mention my design/sewing/pr/mom/t.v.slot/YW etiquette dinner/expo/PYP stuff on my list to do.

See what I mean. I am so blessed. You can't complain about your blessings. That's just lame.

At the same time I kind of feel like I 'm paying attention to everything but not enough attention to anything.

Still. The Lord told me to go this way. He must have known what a terrible procrastinator and time management-er I am. I'm sure there is a way to grow and learn to make these weaknesses my strengths.

Gotta keep reaching and growing and remembering that tomorrow is a new day. Tomorrow I can be perfect in those areas.

I've done hard things before. I can do this too!

Here's a picture of Kevin and I. He's a good man who supports me endlessly. Regardless of whether or not I'm complaining about my blessings ;)


BreAnna said...

You can absolutely complain. You clearly see the blessings and are not complaining about that, rather the state of mind/life they propel you into. Totally different.

Quote I love
"She was a mess of gorgeous chaos and you could see it in her eyes"
I'm happy to be that woman!

Amy at Ameroonie Designs said...

Feeling overwhelmed is perfectly normal and okay! So many times I think we over-filter ourselves. In our efforts to not sound ungrateful, we often leave the impression that "all is well" leaving others to feel they are inadequate when life seems like a lot to manage. You have the right attitude, are making strides to handle all that is asked of you, and you do so recognizing that the path you are on is where you have been led by the Lord. There is nothing wrong with feeling inadequate- for that is usually the moment when we turn to Him and learn to rely on his help to become all that we have the potential to be.
Love you- keep doing GREAT things!

Emilie said...

BreAnna, thank you. It's nice to be given that permission from an outside source.

Amy, Thank you for helping me turn this into something positive. Growth is good. It's hard, but it's good.