Saturday, June 13, 2009

Its over

Its over.


I am still trying to nurse for the one feeding at night.

I couldn't watch him be hungry anymore.

I just couldn't.

I missed 4 feedings on Thursday and my body didn't feel a thing. No engorgement. Nothing.

That's when you know you don't make enough to sustain a life.

I'm sad, but its freeing in a way. I would do anything, give anything, for my children. Anything. But its nice to have my body all to myself.

Its nice to be able to share the responsibility of nourishment with others. Karaia and Beckham have loved being able to feed Sanders.

So, its over, but its not the end. Thankfully most things in life come attached with happy and sad parts.

I have mourned the sad parts.

Time to focus on the happy.


Tobi said...

I'm feeling kind of jealous. Colin is starting to do the suck, pull away, suck, pull away routine and the bottles are looking better and better.

Keep focusing on the happy because now you can have a full, satisfied baby. That is something to smile about.

Emily said...

Should I give you a "yay" hug or a "oh" hug? Maybe one of each. I didn't cry until I put Logan in a toddler bed - and then it hit me like a ton of bricks.

How are yous guys? Have you had the reception yet?

Teresa said...

I love all the new pics of your kids. They sure are adorable aren't they? We are going to miss you guys this week.