...I am not perfect. What? You already knew? Yeah, me too.
That is not necessarily a bad thing. It leaves all sorts of room for improvement and new found awesomeness.
Today was a less than perfect mommy day. Some, most, days are better than others. This was the opposite of better. But only during the witching hour between 5pm and 6pm when at some point Kevin arrives home.
I lost it. Like really lost it on Karaia. Unkind tone, harsher than necessary words. She came to me later and said, "Mom, can I talk to you? I've rehearsed this but I don't want you to get mad."
"Make sure you don't say anything disrespectful/rude and I won't." (yes, I recognized the irony as I said then too)
In a very loving way she said, "You always tell me I can use kinder words and tone instead of just going straight to saying things angry and I feel like you could have used kinder words and tone."
And then she left.
I was left with my thoughts and my heart. What she said was not new to me. I'd been giving myself the same lecture since the words flew out of my mouth. But I was so, so proud of her. The bursting kind of proud. She had been listening.....AND learning. Learning enough to teach.
I was proud of her for loving me enough to teach me. I was proud of her for doing it in a loving way. And I was proud of her for understanding her role in what happened and while I definitely could have delivered my words better she knew the core of the message was true and she owned her part in that.
We both had a good cry and lots of sorrys and I love yous. I am grateful for the hard, real feelings and emotions we share around this home. It makes me excited for our future.
Monday, January 7, 2013
Sunday, January 6, 2013
Now I remember
Wow. 6 days in and I almost forgot to post. Nice.
We switched to 9:00 am church today. My kids were so well behaved and obedient this morning. I hope it continues.
I also taught the Young Women lesson using the new method. What a neat experience to walk into a class room prepared but not really know what will be taught. Yet, in the end, it was exactly what was needed.
There is more that could be said, but I'd just closed my eyes when I remembered about the blog.
Hooray for me for remembering AND going to be before midnight!
We switched to 9:00 am church today. My kids were so well behaved and obedient this morning. I hope it continues.
I also taught the Young Women lesson using the new method. What a neat experience to walk into a class room prepared but not really know what will be taught. Yet, in the end, it was exactly what was needed.
There is more that could be said, but I'd just closed my eyes when I remembered about the blog.
Hooray for me for remembering AND going to be before midnight!
Saturday, January 5, 2013
Food is reeeeeeealy good
Last night was rough. It was even hard to sleep.
This morning I got up and went to work out. I'm not going to lie. I probably gave 25% of normal, but it was really all I had to give.
Then, THEN, 8:00am came and they gave us food. A banana, a power bar, and water. It was awesome.
I kept dreaming about sushi last night so today I grabbed some at Costco. It wasn't as amazing as Sushi Monster, but it's cheaper and I can see craving it. Good to know.
For dinner I made Cafe Rio chicken. Holy cow that was incredible! It was super easy too.
It was nice to be home as a family and not have anywhere we had to be. We played a few games, watched a movie and overall just hung out. We should have been taking Christmas down, but we didn't feel like it :)
It was a really good day.
This morning I got up and went to work out. I'm not going to lie. I probably gave 25% of normal, but it was really all I had to give.
Then, THEN, 8:00am came and they gave us food. A banana, a power bar, and water. It was awesome.
I kept dreaming about sushi last night so today I grabbed some at Costco. It wasn't as amazing as Sushi Monster, but it's cheaper and I can see craving it. Good to know.
For dinner I made Cafe Rio chicken. Holy cow that was incredible! It was super easy too.
It was nice to be home as a family and not have anywhere we had to be. We played a few games, watched a movie and overall just hung out. We should have been taking Christmas down, but we didn't feel like it :)
It was a really good day.
Friday, January 4, 2013
For the Knowledge
I haven't eaten since 6:30 pm yesterday.
On purpose.
And I will continue to refrain from consuming any calories until tomorrow morning around 8:00 am. I have been drinking water like a camel though.
Now, once a month I fast for religious reasons, but it's never for this long. AND today is following two days of very low caloric intake.
Why.....WHY would I do this to myself? For the knowledge. In the following weeks my trainer is going to issue a different challenge every week involving types of food. The only one I know for sure about, but know no details, is we will have a week with extra protein. He said that for some that week will involve headaches and for others they will have more energy than they are used to.
The reason is that everyone's genetic make-up is different and therefore one nutrition plan for everyone will never work. Depending on your lineage you might need more protein, or more veggies and fruits, or more carbs. It all comes down to what type of food was available to your ancestors in their region of the world.
It's the same reason the Atkins diet doesn't work for everyone, but for others it works amazingly well.
I'm excited to learn what works best for my body. It will be rough, but the knowledge will be invaluable.
That being said, this is stupid hard!
Oh, and I made my family dinner...again! It was a serious act of love and there may or may not have been a few tears that escaped my eyes when certain smells accosted my face.
Thank goodness everyone loved it or I may have lost it.
On purpose.
And I will continue to refrain from consuming any calories until tomorrow morning around 8:00 am. I have been drinking water like a camel though.
Now, once a month I fast for religious reasons, but it's never for this long. AND today is following two days of very low caloric intake.
Why.....WHY would I do this to myself? For the knowledge. In the following weeks my trainer is going to issue a different challenge every week involving types of food. The only one I know for sure about, but know no details, is we will have a week with extra protein. He said that for some that week will involve headaches and for others they will have more energy than they are used to.
The reason is that everyone's genetic make-up is different and therefore one nutrition plan for everyone will never work. Depending on your lineage you might need more protein, or more veggies and fruits, or more carbs. It all comes down to what type of food was available to your ancestors in their region of the world.
It's the same reason the Atkins diet doesn't work for everyone, but for others it works amazingly well.
I'm excited to learn what works best for my body. It will be rough, but the knowledge will be invaluable.
That being said, this is stupid hard!
Oh, and I made my family dinner...again! It was a serious act of love and there may or may not have been a few tears that escaped my eyes when certain smells accosted my face.
Thank goodness everyone loved it or I may have lost it.
Thursday, January 3, 2013
Looooooong day
Today seemed extra long.
I made dinner three nights in a row. Oh yeah! I'm rockin' it.
Read lots, and lots, and lots of books with the two littles.
The house is still a complete disaster but I can't find the motivation to do anything about it. Don't come visit. It's ridiculous around here.
But I made dinner, even if the chicken was dry. Dinner was still made and it was healthy. Drop of awesome.
I'm doing a challenge at my gym. It's for 6 weeks and each week will be a different focus. Today is the second day of Burst Cycle Diet and then tomorrow I fast until Saturday. I have a feeling tomorrow is going to seem extra long too.
I made dinner three nights in a row. Oh yeah! I'm rockin' it.
Read lots, and lots, and lots of books with the two littles.
The house is still a complete disaster but I can't find the motivation to do anything about it. Don't come visit. It's ridiculous around here.
But I made dinner, even if the chicken was dry. Dinner was still made and it was healthy. Drop of awesome.
I'm doing a challenge at my gym. It's for 6 weeks and each week will be a different focus. Today is the second day of Burst Cycle Diet and then tomorrow I fast until Saturday. I have a feeling tomorrow is going to seem extra long too.
Wednesday, January 2, 2013
The Four Hour Lunch
These girls are staples in my life. Even if I only see some of them once a year on January 1st.
 |
| Sarah, Me, Catherine, Chrissy January 1, 2013 Little America |
We didn't even realize we were in height order until after. We are just
cool like that. Not in age order though....I'm actually the youngest of
the bunch. Probably in more ways than one ;)
For those just joining us, first off, Hello! I'm so glad you are here. Second, these are my cousins. The Four Musketeers. We have a tradition of getting together every New Year's day. We change what we do every year, but we make sure we do it together.
We went to the Little America Coffee Shop. It was perfect. We had a great lunch and then because it wasn't busy they just let us sit, and sit, and sit there. Sarah brought games, but we ended up just chatting. We are all very different and all have different strengths and areas we can improve so it's wonderful to try and learn from someone else's strength while you share your strength.
We ended up sitting around that table for nearly four hours! One of my favorite traditions ever!
Tuesday, January 1, 2013
Review and Goals
Here we are again, January 1st.
Looking back on last year there have been some super highs and some things I like to, and thankfully can, change. The number one thing is this blog.
The truth is as much of a pain in the rear it was to write something everyday in 2011, at the end of 2012 I am really sad how much I did not document the simple everyday, potentially boring, beyond exciting parts of my and my family's life.
So, every day is back! Are you excited? I hope so because this year I will be doing things I have never ever done. Lucky for me, and you (?), I'm an open book and I'll be sharing a bunch of things you probably don't care about and hopefully somethings that will make your day brighter and us better friends. I know. Don't pretend you didn't just do the happy dance. I felt it ;)
I reviewed my goals for last year. I only completed one. It was a HUGE one that I thought I was going to have on my goal list for many, many more years. I am so grateful to be on this side of signing a contract. However, the other two were more important. Truthfully, I'd totally forgotten that I'd even made them.
The check your temperature one is better. I am actively working on it. There are slip ups, but I have found ways to disengage the emotion and just parent. It will be a life long goal, which is not a bad thing.
Reading the Book of Mormon as a family every day. Why is this SO hard?!?!?!?! I love reading that book. I am baffled why I have failed to integrate it into our family routine.
Taking everything into consideration here are my personal 2013 goals and my word for the year (my design web site is thiiiiiiiiiiis close to be up and running. I will do goals for my designs on that site)
1: Make more dinners for my family. While my family is soooooooo supportive of all my creative endeavors and actually cheer when I say we are having cold cereal for dinner (except Karaia) I know they will appreciate more.....well, just MORE...on that front. The goal is at least 4 dinners a week. I know some of you are wondering what we will eat the other days, frankly, I am too, but I am not perfect in this area and I want to give myself a chance at success. In the meantime, if this goal is making you hyperventilate, and you feel the need to save me and my family, I would be more than happy to entertain how you make making dinner work.
2: Get the family on a chore schedule. I have mentioned multiple times how NOT on a chore schedule we are. Our house is never truly dirty, but it is often....let's say "lived in". While I don't truly mind all of the clutter because we do have a lot of fun in our home and do play a lot of games and things other than chores, I think there is room to improve.
3: Laugh more. A WHOLE lot more. I really don't think my children will remember how many nights a week I make dinner or even how tightly run the house is, but they WILL remember how much we laughed. Maybe we will have a stand-up comedy night every month where we all write our own jokes. Who knows. I just know I'm making this one happen!
4: Integrate the Book of Mormon into my family's routine. I CAN do this!
My word for the year is REACH
It means a lot of different things. Reach out to others, Reach deep down into who I am, Reach my children in a way they feel it the most, Reach just beyond my comfort zone, Reach to grow, Reach to be who I was meant to be.
And finally, because I really want to document more of the everyday that goes on around here, Sanders said today, "Mom, I like T-Rex dinosaurs. But I really want to calm them down!"
Funny kid.
Looking back on last year there have been some super highs and some things I like to, and thankfully can, change. The number one thing is this blog.
The truth is as much of a pain in the rear it was to write something everyday in 2011, at the end of 2012 I am really sad how much I did not document the simple everyday, potentially boring, beyond exciting parts of my and my family's life.
So, every day is back! Are you excited? I hope so because this year I will be doing things I have never ever done. Lucky for me, and you (?), I'm an open book and I'll be sharing a bunch of things you probably don't care about and hopefully somethings that will make your day brighter and us better friends. I know. Don't pretend you didn't just do the happy dance. I felt it ;)
I reviewed my goals for last year. I only completed one. It was a HUGE one that I thought I was going to have on my goal list for many, many more years. I am so grateful to be on this side of signing a contract. However, the other two were more important. Truthfully, I'd totally forgotten that I'd even made them.
The check your temperature one is better. I am actively working on it. There are slip ups, but I have found ways to disengage the emotion and just parent. It will be a life long goal, which is not a bad thing.
Reading the Book of Mormon as a family every day. Why is this SO hard?!?!?!?! I love reading that book. I am baffled why I have failed to integrate it into our family routine.
Taking everything into consideration here are my personal 2013 goals and my word for the year (my design web site is thiiiiiiiiiiis close to be up and running. I will do goals for my designs on that site)
1: Make more dinners for my family. While my family is soooooooo supportive of all my creative endeavors and actually cheer when I say we are having cold cereal for dinner (except Karaia) I know they will appreciate more.....well, just MORE...on that front. The goal is at least 4 dinners a week. I know some of you are wondering what we will eat the other days, frankly, I am too, but I am not perfect in this area and I want to give myself a chance at success. In the meantime, if this goal is making you hyperventilate, and you feel the need to save me and my family, I would be more than happy to entertain how you make making dinner work.
2: Get the family on a chore schedule. I have mentioned multiple times how NOT on a chore schedule we are. Our house is never truly dirty, but it is often....let's say "lived in". While I don't truly mind all of the clutter because we do have a lot of fun in our home and do play a lot of games and things other than chores, I think there is room to improve.
3: Laugh more. A WHOLE lot more. I really don't think my children will remember how many nights a week I make dinner or even how tightly run the house is, but they WILL remember how much we laughed. Maybe we will have a stand-up comedy night every month where we all write our own jokes. Who knows. I just know I'm making this one happen!
4: Integrate the Book of Mormon into my family's routine. I CAN do this!
My word for the year is REACH
It means a lot of different things. Reach out to others, Reach deep down into who I am, Reach my children in a way they feel it the most, Reach just beyond my comfort zone, Reach to grow, Reach to be who I was meant to be.
And finally, because I really want to document more of the everyday that goes on around here, Sanders said today, "Mom, I like T-Rex dinosaurs. But I really want to calm them down!"
Funny kid.
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