well spent

Today started off with a soccer game. Tennyson seems much more interested in the ball this spring than he was in the fall.

Then we decided to help Grandma Candace clean up her yard and earn some Disney spending money. The oldest two did fantasic and the youngest two did really well for their ages. Thanks for letting us help grandma candace!

We were done yet though. We came home and planted peas and beans. And tackled a few more yard chores.

Tennyson told me tonight that all that hard work and soccer running made him tired!

Earlier today Kevin asked Sanders if he was a monkey.

"Noooo!"

"What are you then?"

"Me a man."

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No wait...I can explain!

So.....do you remember a week ago when I said I was going to post every other day and then I went silent for a week? Oh you do? I was sort of hoping maybe you weren't listening reading really well.

This is the deal, see I made that post really late the night before I flew with most of my family for a trip to Washington D.C.. I don't post when we go on vacation before we go. My blog is public and I just think that would be asking for trouble to tell the interwebs when our home will be empty. So there I left you. Wondering if I had forgotten my commitment or possibly if I'd forgotten how to type. Both are wonderful hypotheses and yet would prove to be incorrect.

It was a FANTASTIC trip, but we were beat by the time we reached our hotel every night and it was all I could do just stay awake enough to get the kids to sleep.  I thought I would be able to do a quick little blog every other day while gone, but my head was so full of the days adventures that coming up with thoughts that didn't divulge that we weren't in our home felt like a chore....and I was on vacation after all ;)

I will get pictures and details up very soon.

For Donna

Donna is my cousin Chrissy's aunt. We've grown to know each other through mutual holiday parties and family gathers. She happens to be in the same precinct as me. Toward the end of the evening she called my name and said, "You aren't blogging enough! Reading your and Chrissy's blog became part of my nightly routine. "To which her husband, Kevin, added, "No kidding. You gain a following and then you just stop." This, of course was all said in jest with a foundation of truth :)

SO, Donna, I will try. I'm finding it hard to commit to every day, BUT I will commit to every other day.

It helps to know it's been missed. Thanks Donna!!

In other news, Kevin won a State Delegate seat tonight! The ironic thing is that the last seat came down to a vote between my Kevin and Donna's Kevin. Funny huh? It was REALLY close. Either way a Kevin would have won and that would have been great!

Mistakes are opportunities to learn

I have a few cousins who have made commitments to blog everyday this year. It is SO fun for me to read their posts every day. Thank you Skye and Mary!

Remembering how much I LOVED when anyone would comment on any of my posts and realizing that I had done a poor job with this lately I decided that tonight I wanted in on the conversation, no matter what it was.

Little did I know it would lead me to my own post. Skye posted tonight about the frustrations of the world's portrayal of women as objects and the effect it has on us personally with our own body image and feelings of worth. She invited her readers to share their opinions on the subject and anyone who knows me knows they can pretty much guarantee I'll have something to say ;)

I wanted to post my comment I made on Skye's blog here because I thought it import, mostly for Karaia, that I document a certain experience I had with her a few weeks ago and my feelings regarding it. I also thought it important so that as my children grow and reread my blog they will have no doubts as to what I hope the end goal of my mothering to to be for them.

Here is my comment:

I usually read your post through my google reader which isn't the easiest way to comment. But tonight I decided that no matter what you posted I wanted to be part of the conversation and just clicked over to your blog before I even began to read. I'm SO glad I did.

This is a hot button topic for me as well. We are taught to take good care of ourselves. To value the bodies Heavenly Father has provided us. In some ways that means show case them, physically, in the best light possible. But this is a double edge sword for we can too easily cross the line of improvement of self to comparison of self.

I had a moment at the store the other day where I was feeling less than attractive. Karaia was with me and caught me glancing at a mirror I was passing and sucking in and patting down the love handles as if that was going to make a difference. It was a moment. Just fraction of a second of movement. I didn't think anyone, let alone my 9 year old daughter was watching. The daughter I have consciously made sure I never say any negative body image comments about myself around. But she picked up on my subtle frown and my quick movements and asked in disbelief, "Do you think you are BIG??!?!?!?! Because you are SO not."

I was crushed, well and flattered, but mostly crushed that she knew what I was thinking in that second of self disapproval. Because I knew that because of the brief, poor, example on my part she would begin to examine herself in each mirror as we continued our shopping. And she did. Before that event she was happily oblivious that there would be any reason to scrutinize her mirror image.

The shame of teaching such a lesson is weighty.

We can't run away from the media. And at some point most women will succumb to feelings of being less because of it. But that doesn't mean we can't fit our children with armor of the strongest self value that stems from personal growth.

I try very hard to teach my children that it's not about size, it's about health. It's about being able to do everything with our bodies that we would like to and that Heavenly Father needs us too. My children know about calories and exercising. They look at labels and make food decisions based on the information they find there. No one is ever judged on their choices, but they know they have choices. They know about portion sizes and have started, on their own, to be mindful of that. They know healthy choices make them feel better and they can play longer without feeling as tired.

I'm hoping that with these habits formed as children they will grow to view their bodies more as tools and less as packaging. That they will care more about what they can do vs how it looks. That their children will never learn, inadvertently, that mirrors can be used to tear themselves down, but rather to confirm what they already know. That they are of worth regardless of the package.

What are your thoughts and experiences about this subject?

Celebrate

Big things happened today, so Megs came over to celebrate with me because Kevin is out of town. She brought me my favorite salad and my favorite nephews that belong to my sister Meghan and we just laughed and cried about the whole affair.

Thank you, Meghan, for taking the time to come be with me. I LOVED it!

PS. I realize I didn't elaborate on what "Big" things happened today but it's still very new and I don't want to jinks anything...but soon, my cute friends, soon :) YAY!!!!

This is good

I have been extremely busy with work. Way more than I'd like to be. However, because of that I have come to learn a few things about myself.

1. I actually quite enjoy "just" being a mom. (Put the rotten tomatoes down. I KNOW being a mom is the best, but you know what I mean)

For so long, and with firm heavenly direction, I have been focused on goals in addition to fine tuning my motherhood role. These goals have be passionately fueled and inspired from a place I can't even accurately describe. They have been good goals and have served in helping me grow into the person, the mom, the friend, the sister, the daughter, the wife I was sent to become. The journey has afforded me a lot of growth I assumed I would only find with the achievement of the goal. Turns out I was wrong.

That doesn't mean I have given up on my goals. Not a chance. It just means it doesn't ache that I'm not there yet. I just means I wish life would slow down a bit so I can enjoy my small children more and I know reaching my goal will only increase the speed. I love my life. Right now. As it is. I feel like I might be missing too much of my kid's time with me and that scares me. I don't want any regrets about this life. I'm not talking about mistakes because I can guarantee I have a running dialog with my Heavenly Father most of the day repenting for choices I make. Regrets are different. Regrets are avoidable if you put your very best self forward.

2. I seriously lack skills in multitasking well. Sure I can multitask, but it's not pretty. 

3. I'm OK being good at what I'm good at and you being good at what you're good at. That being said, I think there is always room for improvement. I purposely surround myself with people who have a strength that is my weakness. Not to put myself down, but to give myself the best possible chance of changing the weakness to a asset.

Finally, I have a really good life. It's not glamorous. We aren't wealthy. But we have what is important and I am content and happy.  For that I find the words within my knowledge to be severely lacking to perfectly capture the depth of gratitude I feel.

First Day of Three

Sanders was the best today. Everything was SO exciting!

We put streamers and balloons on his door so when he woke up he knew it was party time.

 It worked a little too well because at breakfast I noticed his bottom lip out and his head was hanging down. 

"What's wrong Buddy?"

"They not coming."

"Not coming?"

"To my party."

"Who's not coming?"

"Evan.....and Nana."

He truly thought everyone would be over for a party the second he woke up. Since that didn't happen he thought he had been stood up! Poor little guy! We explained the party wasn't until the evening, which helped. But barley.

Not to worry, the rest of the day was spent cleaning and decorating and baking including a special outing for lunch with just Dad and Sanders.

The theme of the party was GREEN!

Sanders is hilarious with the color green. It doesn't matter how many times he sees it in a day, every. single. time it's like someone just gave him a new puppy. That's how excited he gets.

I wish I would have had the presence of mind to have everyone gathered for a picture who was wearing green. So much love! (if you'll notice, Sanders is not wearing a green shirt. He felt the stripe of green on his shirt was festive enough. I decided making the birthday boy wear something he didn't want too was the opposite of cool)

Kevin made this fantastic Ombre green cake. 6 layers of deliciousness!

Sanders was also so grateful and animated with the generous gifts he was given. It was like he won the lottery with each present. THANK YOU!!!!

Thank you to everyone who came or who was here in spirit! It meant so much to Sanders. He has been talking about all the people he loves coming to celebrate this special day with him. Thank you!!!!

He also got a phone call from his special friend Rhyse. She moved last year, but he talks about her every day. In every prayer he is thankful he got to play with Rhyse...even if he hasn't seen her for months. That little girl has a huge place in his heart. 

Sanders loves people. He loves to be silly. He loves his brothers and sister. With every gift he opened he would say, "LOOK, Tennyson! I got......" It was so cute.

He is an independent little fellow who thinks he controls what goes on around here. He doesn't, but he sure tries to over throw the thrown every day. And every day we get to have a little chat about how that is not going to happen.

He is also very affectionate. He loves to hug me around my neck and his favorite way to talk to me is with his hands on my face or around my neck playing with my hair. I melt.

He not really very naughty. Sure he gets into things now and again, but for the most part he will ask me before he starts a new adventure. That being said, once his mind is set on something, it extremely difficult to talk him out of it.

Sanders LOVES to tell you about all the imagination play he and Tennyson have concocted. It's always very elaborate.

We love Sanders. He makes our lives more joyful and keeps our priorities straight.

Happy Birthday, Sanders!!