The beginning of the end has begun

I had an appointment yesterday. Here's the low down.

#1. I now weigh more than I ever, ever have in my whole life....it's kind of weirding me out and it's only going to get worse as the weeks go on.

#2. The baby has not entered the pelvic bone yet (not too worried about that---Tennyson never did until I started pushing)

#3. I am 1cm dilated and 50% effaced!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! BEST. NEWS. EVER.

I know, I know. I doesn't mean anything. I will still probably go over due. Although I have never started to dilate this early. ANYWAY. But just the fact that things have started towards the end is thrilling beyond measure.

We have confirmation that I will not be pregnant forever! WAHOO!

Now I just have to:

~finish painting Tennyson's big boy dresser
~finish the baby quilt
~buy a car seat ('cause it's illegal to bring a baby home with out one..it's the little things)
~organize the two youngest boy's closets
~wash baby clothes (although I did just wash them and get them put away---so maybe....)
~finish painting the kitchen/dinning room

Whew. I'm tired just typing that list. But it can be done. And if it can't I guess I'll just be busy after the baby is born too. Although I'm thinking I should move buying the car seat up to a higher priority.

Let's just hope I get a super nesting boost for the next two weeks.

Counter productive

I'm still here ( I know. you've been up nights because I haven't been posting...sorry about that)

Just busy.

Well, I should be busy, but my body has decided to become counter productive. Instead of letting me sleep to renew my energy in order to accomplish my long list of tasks that need to get done before the baby comes, it has, instead decided that now is the time to start conditioning me to live on less sleep so I can be prepared to care for a newborn.

The average amount of sleep per night has dwindled to about 3-4 hours. Fun. Oh wait, no. No it's not.

Karaia ratted me out yesterday. We were all talking about our day around the dinner table when Karaia factually pointed out, " Mom, you didn't even move from the couch all day!" She wasn't being mean, just trying to paint a visual for Kevin.

It's a good thing she's cute.

It's also a good thing Kevin is understanding and just gives me a sympathetic look instead of judgement. I'm totally keeping him around.

I'm here. Just busy or asleep.

Think big

I had another ultra sound today. It's always so exciting to get a sneak peak at the newest member of the family. He was yawing and sticking out his tongue. Darling. He looks a lot like Karaia did as a newborn.

Anyway, there were some questions if there was a blockage in his urinary tract (nope all clear), hence the ultra sound.

He is measuring at 5lbs 6oz already.

Now here's some math for those of you who crave it but don't get enough of it in your daily lives.

At this point, the baby is said to gain an average of a 1/2 lb a week.

I have 6 weeks left.

AHHHHHHHH!!!!

We are looking at another 8 pounder.

I still remember delivering Beckham. I wish I didn't.

That epi is looking nicer and nicer with each passing day. ( I know, mom. You are thrilled to hear that)

A little perspective

I've seen this before, but a friend sent this to me today and it couldn't have come at a better time.



I suppose I am not a failure, but simply a mom. It's amazing how funny something so tragic can turn into when it's put to music and condensed. I bet my kids get sick of me saying the same things too.

Maybe I should just sing it to them........

Failure

It is quite obvious this morning that I have failed as a mother.

My children care not for the instructions I give them and chose only to fulfill their immediate wants.

We talk about not doddling every day. Literally. We talk about the things that are considered doddling. We talk about what they need to do first BEFORE they can do what they want.

But if I am not right behind them checking up, they somehow magically forget the nice, well thought out, talk we had a mere 15 mins. before. Everyday.

They have consequences for doddling but they hold no lasting, if any, effect.

So it is obvious to me, that I have failed. I don't know how to succeed. It is not from lack of trying. How in the world are these children going to grow up to be productive members of society if I can't even teach them the importance of doing what they say they will regardless of whether or not someone has reminded them of it or is watching them.

It is also obvious that Tennyson will grow up to be a graffiti artist as he, this morning, yet again, found a random crayon and felt the need to tag Beckham's wall.

We have tried everything to curb this behavior. We try to supply him with plenty of paper and supervised coloring time every day. We put up the crayons when he cannot be supervised. He has a chalk board that he can color on whenever his heart desires. But even then he has to be supervised because he cannot control his desire to draw on everything....thank goodness chalk comes off easily.

The feeling of failure. What a lovely feeling to have so early in the morning. It goes nicely with a bowl of cereal and a large cup of tears.

Twitch

My eye is twitching. Well, it's really my eyelid, but you get the point.

My friend tells me that is an indication of a lack of sleep.

Sleep? Ha (twitch)

When it takes 10 minutes to roll from one side (twitch) to the other only to find that other side is not comfortable either, "sleep" becomes a word you used to know.

It also might not help that we spent ALL DAY (twitch) Monday prepping and painting the kitchen/dinning room only to be so displeased with the color we (read I) chose that we had to stop. Now we have diarrhea colored outlines above our cabinets and all along the wall. Nice. (twitch)

The problem is I don't know what color I WANT it to be. Sigh. (twitch) The thing with paint color is you either love it or you hate it. There really aren't very many, "Eh, not my fav but I can live with it" colors.

This is when I need to become friends with a famous interior decorator, Candice Olson will do just fine. Please and thank you., that they will take such pity on my dilemma and come and design my room for free. Because that's the kind of friends we will be....Candice and I. Yup, just those very kinds of friends.

Until then, I think I'll avoid the laundry because

A) I hate folding and putting away laundry

B) I'd have to walk through the diarrhea outlined (twitch, twitch) kitchen to get it. Which will only exacerbate my eye twitching condition.

And

C) I would much rather lay on the couch and close my eyes while Tennyson is napping for a few more minutes.

Good bye (twitch) and good night (twitch)

They've got to eat

And I SO do not know what to make for dinner.

These are the days I wish I would run across some misplaced gift certificate to a local restaurant that I had forgotten I had.

That or someone randomly feeling the need to leave a meal at our door step.

I'd take either one.

That's the kind of not picky girl I am.